Let The Year Begin

Sometimes you order something soft and adorable off Amazon trusting that the description is real because you know, it’s not like you’re blindly ordering off of Wish. You trust that it was made for you since it says “women’s” even though you find out it definitely fits your dog better than it fits you… and obviously looks way cuter. Totally worth the money and disappointment.

Although we’re already almost two months into the new year, I guess this post is better late than never. I have 15 minutes until I start training and Buckley is in the kitchen below me throwing pots and pans around. I think he’s finally figured out that Chevy and I hide up here during the day now. We also only got out for a 20 minute walk vs the 2 hour hike he really needs to go on so I’m sure he’s got a little more pent up demon adorable puppy energy still floating around in there.

We all know how things are going outside in the real world right now. I mean, how can you not unless you live way off grid (secretly, I’m jealous). There have definitely been a lot of ups and downs where life is not sure what it really wants to throw at me but last week was a really hard week. If you haven’t seen it on the IG (Follow us at @controlhaltdelete) already, I had to say a bittersweet goodbye to the self-employed life. Still haven’t figured out what my Bio is going to read now!

Okay okay, let’s be honest. My clients will never be rid of me and I’ll obviously be doing a little “hobby” sitting/walking, but as for full-time work? I’m onto new and completely different things. I started my training as a call center representative for an insurance company this week. Let’s just say, I’m not really sure if I remember how to drive at this point and it’s only been 4 days. But in all honesty I am really enjoying it so far. I’ve always loved school and learning new things so it’s the perfect gig. The best part? Chevy gets to sleep in his bed next to my desk all day. Now that makes for a pretty happy dog and a happy dog mom.

I’m sure in the next couple weeks I’ll start to miss the hustle and bustle of running around like a maniac. It helps keep my mind quiet more than anything. Going from walking 46,000 steps a day to maybe 4,500 is a bit of a change, but I’ll adapt. I decided it was the best idea to find a new place to board the boys too. I’ve loved every minute of where we are now and have made some fast friends over the last couple years and learned a lot, but

1. I really can’t afford full board for two horses.
2. I really can’t afford to drive an hour round trip to ride maybe one horse (I know, woe is me)
3. I need to get my routine back and take care of them myself.

Lucky me, I found a barn with 1.5 acre lot and a shed, outdoor, trails, round pen, and only it’s only a 10-minute haul *gasp* Moving day is Saturday and I’m hoping even though they’ve been off work for a while, they’ll settle in okay. I’m really hoping that this change will be for the better. It will get me back on track in my own brain and body, and maybe help the boys and I find our connection again.

I’ve loved seeing people take advantage of the lockdowns and pandemic atmosphere to build a better relationship with their horses and I was hoping I would have been able to do the same. Unfortunately I’ve just felt so distant and separate from them. I know Brantley feels it too, you can tell when he looks at me. He knows I’m not completely there and in the moment with them which you all know is my number one rule and the I always try to abide by. Obviously I’m not perfect and you’ll catch me checking e-mails and responding to clients on the end of a lunge line but I’m really hoping that will end here. Just more media for the interweb and that’s all.

All in all, things are going pretty good. A lot of life changes but I have one hell of a support system in my life right now. My family, my friends, and most of all my clients have been amazing through this and I can’t even begin to talk about how thankful I am for them. You never really know what an impact you make on people until you have to say your “goodbyes”.

Keep your head up out there, do what you need to do for you and the people that matter will still love you. xx